Life by Design

I Won't Accept Defeat

Romans 8:37 Nay, in all these things, we are more than conquerors through him that loved us!

   

More and more these days, I have these experiences in my life that make me pause and think about who I really am. Not just who I say I am, but when I am in action, living and doing in the moment, what kind of character traits I exhibit.  Well, recently I had one of those experiences that on the surface was inconsequential, yet it held a deeper meaning of what I am all about. So here is the incident.

 

I was at an event with a silent auction. While perusing the room, I saw an item that I loved. In fact, upon taking my seat for dinner I’d noticed that item and periodically caught glimpses of it during the night.  Upon the bidding time, I began to place my bid and there by entered into somewhat of a bidding war with another bidder.  As the auction prepared to close, I hovered around the table as a mother bird hovers around her nest, in sight but somewhat inconspicuous.  However, the other bidder was doing the same.

 

He bid, I bid, He bid, I bid, someone else bid, He bid, I bid and so it goes. At last call for the auction, I am in winning position. As the attendant comes to collect the bid sheets, there by closing the bidding, my opponent’s spouse swoops in to place their last bid. Here is the kicker; I have the opportunity to bid one last time, but I don’t. I allow them to win the prize.

 

Now at first glance, this probably seems to be just a fun incident with little consequence. But in fact, it is much, much more than that. So much so, that I could not allow myself to purge the memory of it until I assessed its meaning to who I am and my character.

 

The underlying meaning is that in that moment and space of time, I allowed defeat.  Not only did I allow it, I ushered it in. So it got me thinking, how many other times has the brass ring been in my hand that I chose to let it go.  How many other times had God placed victory in my life only to be defeated by my own decision? I believe that in life, we are given opportunities to succeed and that for whatever reason we decide not to go for it.  We won’t make the call, introduce ourselves, place the last bid, or whatever that action is that could bring a win to our life. If we are going to be successful, winning has to be instinctual.   

 

Not that we have to be evil competitors, but the will to win has got to be a part of your life. In my case, the will to win is there but somehow I allowed myself to “shrink back” when I viewed the consequence as having no real bearing on my life.  But here is what I am coming to understand. All decisions have consequences. All decisions shape our character and our destiny. So, from this day on, I have decided that I do not accept defeat!

 

God made me a winner; in fact, Romans 8:37 says that in all these things we are “more than conquerors” through him that loved us! So today I challenge you to look at yourself. What small character flaw exists in your life that could be having a bigger impact than you think? Find it, weed it out, and watch the result. For me…I won’t accept defeat. Will you?

"Hello, My Name is Enough"

 
Last weekend, I attended The Harvest Girls - Women's Empowerment conference. Upon entering the venue, each woman was given an "Hello, My Name Is" tag. I am sure that I have been given a name tag to identify myself at every event of this kind that I have attended.  After all, my name says who I am and of course, people want to know who you are.
 
However, this name tag was different because when it was handed to me, it did not give me a name I already knew, (Cynthia, that is). It gave me a name that I was to embrace and embody for the next 365 days, and hopefully forever.
 
I suspect that the name tags for all of the women were carefully thought about as the facilitator, Dr. Elon Bomani, prepared them. However, I am certain that there was no rhyme or reason as to how we would receive our "new name" tag as they were simply handed to each woman as she walked in the door.  All who attended received names that were clear, definite, and to the point. Names that were generally positive, uplifting and affirming of who they are or are to become. For instance, "Hello, My name is "Confident". Hello my name is "Beautiful". Hello my name is "Vibrant". You get the point. I watched in delight as each woman wore her name tag, eager to embrace and affirm that attribute within her, or to embrace the possibility of becoming what it said.
 
However, for me the experience was a little different yet extremely fitting. You see, my name tag said..."Hello, My Name is Enough". Wow, it caught me off guard. "Enough". In true fashion, even in my busyness, I took this as an opportunity to reflect the meaning of the moment. I could take this name tag in so many ways, and in fact I did. 
 
 "Hello, My Name is Enough". This must mean that I have had enough. Enough of living up to others expectations, enough of being too busy or enough of being everything to everybody. But no, that could not be it. Because this was an empowerment conference, so surely our facilitator would never have named me anything that would conjure up frustration in my mind.
 
"Hello, My Name is Enough".  Maybe that indicated that I have given enough. I am involved in the community, serve as a leader in my church, I teach Sunday School.  I try to be the best wife, daughter, friend and business woman I can. And even in the middle of receiving my name tag, I was serving at the conference. So, "I have given, enough" would certainly have been applicable. And yet, as I considered the meaning of my new name, it still led me to a feel "less than glorified". Knowing that the facilitator intended for me to live in the "name" for the next 365 days, I surmised that this could not be the meaning of my new name either.
 
Then it hit me! "Hello, My name is Enough" I am Enough. I AM ENOUGH! You see I am in the process overcoming P P S. People Pleasing Syndrome. So I had to be given this new name to let me know that I am enough and that in God's eyes I have more than enough to accomplish everything that he has set out for me to do. I am nice enough, I am pretty enough, I am smart enough, to get the job done.  No need for me to seek approval any longer because I   am    enough.
 
My need to seek approval all this time has simply meant, that I didn't know that I am Enough. I don't need another title, degree or promotion because in my current state, I am enough.  So, since I am smart enough, educated enough and gifted enough, all that's left for me to do is to step into my destiny. 
 
So the next time you question yourself about that thing you want to accomplish remind yourself that you too are "Enough".  And remember that God is more than enough to perform and complete every good work that he set out to do in you! (Romans 4:21).
 
"Hello, Your Name is Enough"...Live it, Love it, Embrace it. Now go get your destiny!
 
Signing out 'til next time,
 
Cynthia "Enough" Newman
Make your life...Always Beautiful...Always By Design!

Welcome!

Welcome to "Life By Design" inspirational blog. It has been a long time in the making, but it's finally here!

 

Why so long? For most of us, starting is often the hardest part of the process.

 

Why a blog? I love to communicate. It doesn't matter whether it's speaking, writing, television, radio, even non-verbal. I love connecting, uplifting, empowering and  encouraging. Communication is my passion and what better way to pursue it, than to share my thoughts with you in hopes that you too will find your passion and share it with your world as well.

 

Why "Life By Design"? I've been on the path of self discovery for many years. Genesis 1:26 says that God created us in His image and likeness, but who really knows what that means? Through studying the Bible and many hours of quiet time, I have learned that God has given me the ability to do so much more than I can ever imagine. He's endowed me with His ability to create, speak things into existence and to be limitless within the boundaries of my humanity.  It is in this spirit that I have learned that I should live my life on purpose and "by design".

 

I'll send posts to your email periodically. Feel free to comment, pass them along and invite others to join the mailing list!

 

Sometimes there may even be questions to aid you in your discovery process. So grab your journal and join me as I continue to pursue life through this blog. Sometimes inspirational, sometimes motivational but always By Design.

 

 

Enjoy,

 

Cynthia Newman 

 "Life... Always beautiful...Always by design!"

 

 

What I Believe

 

In my quest to discover my talents and abilities, I spent one Saturday afternoon  at the local library in a creative writing class. I've always loved to write but have never had any formal training. Our first assignment was to write a poem about what we believe in .  Here is the result.

 

 

What I believe

 

I believe in God

That we all have a source.

I believe that love conquers all and when you get to something unconquerable, love will conquer it to.

 

I believe in sleep,

the place where we go to dream, imagine and create our “real world”.

I believe that when I wake up I am new again.

 

I believe that we should live life from the inside out.

Learning who we are will shape our destiny.

 

I believe that if we believe that everything will be okay, it always will be.

 

To love, to live, to care, to grow, to suffer and rise again victorious; these are the things in which I believe.

Gone Soft?

Good Morning,

 

You may not know that I have a passion for writing. In fact, I have a passion for communication of all forms. I've been journaling for years in an effort to become a better me. Often God gives me an inspirational word in my quiet time that is meant just for me, and sometimes it is meant to be used by me as I share it with others. Today was one of those days. I just feel compelled to share this inspirational writing as God gave it to me. I hope it blesses you as well!

 

I welcome your feedback...Thanks for reading it!

Cyn

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Gone Soft?

By Cynthia Newman

 

My Fortune Cookie: Be a doer of deeds and not just of words.

 

My Bible: But be ye doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving your own selves. (James 1:22)

 

I’ve had that little piece of fortune cookie paper floating around my purse for weeks. If you know me, then you know that I change purses like I change undergarments (daily)! But somehow, that tiny piece of paper managed to follow me around long enough for me to take notice.

 

Today I awakened to find myself pondering my plight. Where I am and how I am using the voice that God gave me. Am I making an impact? Am I doing things that uplift others or am just helping myself? When I hear a call for help do I stop and meet the need or do my words end the capacity of my comforting?

 

This week, as I sat to reflect on my life, I realized that I had been passing the opportunity to help those in need. There were calls by women struggling to get ahead and wanting to be mentored. There were children needing a responsible adult to step in and be a rock in their lives. There were women trying to escape their situation and needing some strong person to step in and show the way.  I am sure I get these types of calls regularly, but for some reason, this week, God stopped me long enough to slow me down and cause me to take a look at my actions.

 

When I examined myself, I realized that I had “gone soft”. Somewhere in my process of life and trying to achieve my goals, I had forgotten to slow down and help others achieve theirs. Now I am not saying that I don't lend a hand to those in need. I do my share, but in reflecting, I found that sometimes the level of my compassion is centered on my words (e.g. “I'll pray for you”) and that my actions didn't always see the situation through to resolution.

 

While I know that I am busy (these days we all are), God showed me that there are times when people need more than just my words. That he has equipped me with the capacity to help and that is what I must do.  For example, can I use my contacts to provide resources to a person in need? Can I take an hour a week to spend time with that child who needs just that…my time? Can I give to the person who may need groceries, the money I planned to use for new shoes? These are decisions that we all have to make. But only I know if I can and I will.

 

I must be clear and say that the bible teaches us that “wisdom is the principle thing and in all thy getting, get an understanding” (Prov. 4:7). So, we must allow the Holy Spirit to lead us into discerning when we are to help and when we are to be still. But, the Holy Spirit, who leads you into all truth (John

16:13

), will do just that.

 

God is calling all of us to a higher level…will you answer the call? Or have you “Gone Soft”?

Do You!

Colossians 2:6-(The Remix Bible)

 

  From the Shadows to the Substance

 

“My counsel for you is simple and straight forward . Just go ahead with what you’ve been given. You’ve received Christ Jesus, the Master, now live like it. You’re deeply rooted in him. You’re were constructed upon him. You know your way around the faith now do what you’ve been taught. School’s out! Quit studying the subject and start living it. And let your living spill into Thanksgiving.

  

Recently, I was reading a book called “Finding Flow” (Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi). The book speaks of our need to determine who we are, what we want out of life, and what makes us happy. In essence, its premise is that since life on earth is finite, we must determine what we do with our time and how we make ourselves happy or some one else will always use our time to meet their goals. That is how we find flow, by figuring out what we want and living it.

 

In my personal “Path to Self-discovery”. I am finding out that the only way to really be happy is to do me!  As women, we can spend our lives doing so many other things, doing what other people want, meeting others expectations, and even being worried about what others think. But all of those sources are external…meaning we are “doing them”. However, to truly be at your happiest, you must look internally.  In other words you must take time and make time to do you!  This is not a call for selfishness. It is a call for you to recognize that God has placed something unique in all of us. He has given us all that special something on the inside, His "divine design" for our lives, which is who we are supposed to be.  But at some point you must step out of the shadows of everyone else and get on to doing “you!”

 

The passage above in Colossians instructs us to do just that. Stop all the studying, stop all of the figuring out, no more deliberating with yourself and others…just do you! To keep it simple, we already have Jesus living inside of us and we already know our way around the faith. All that’s left now is to live it. Step out of everyone’s shadow, into your own substance and just do it. Write that book, sing that song, take that vacation, get on to pursuing your passion. Remember, your failure to identify and focus on what you want gives other silent permission to use you to achieve their clearly stated goals.

 

To help you get started, here are a few questions to answer in your private time. If you don't already own one, purchase a journal dedicated to discovering what you are all about. Ponder these questions reflectively, answer them in written form  and then begin your journey of discovering who you are!

 

What did I envision myself being as a child and how close am I to realizing what I envsioned? (Consider various apsects of your life, career, relationships, spiritual. etc)

 

If I had no constraints on my life what would I be doing at this stage in my life? 

 

What personal goals/dreams have I given up (or placed in the background) that need to be brought to the forefront of my life? 

 

Enjoy the the journey!

Cynthia

"From Inspiration to Transformation"